Use sanitizer
No wait – that’s the soap
Ok, wash your hands now
While cracking a joke
We’ll start with a history
Look at the patient
Why are you pausing?
Remember the basics
Ask open questions
And don’t interrupt
Acknowledge emotions
Please don’t be abrupt
“When was your last period”
“What about condoms?”
They don’t have a uterus
What is your problem?
Now let’s do a physical
Where should you listen?
No, that is the sternum
The heart isn’t missing
Feel the carotids
But don’t choke them out
Describe what you’re doing
There’s no room for doubt
What’s on the problem list?
Order some labs
How should we treat them?
What meds should we grab?
Documentation
Let’s write up a note
Include what is relevant
Don’t over-quote
Now we are finished
Good work with that case
On to the next one
Let’s keep up the pace
You’re a med student
You’ll bumble and stumble
And learn many lessons
From patient room fumbles
It’s all part of learning
You’re doing your best
That’s all we can ask for
So don’t sweat the rest
