Amidst a sea of white coats and one girl’s secret smile,
Emerged a secret hope that many years of fear had compiled.

To prove my worth, the penitence for the debt I could not pay.
It is an apology that came too late, to a man who would not stay.

Another for a woman whose mind had long been broken,
And all the years I lost while these words had gone unspoken,

Six lost souls wandered aimlessly, one after the other,
My brother was our father and I sister served as mother.

Later, betrayed in the night by a false friend and misplaced trust,
The character of a man was revealed in the weakness of his lust.

So at last when I began walking this sanctuary of healing rooms,
I was fighting an invisible disease praying not to be consumed.

And in these halls I found others, more lost souls, sick and afraid.
Our mutual struggle united us against the diseases that were laid.

Through dark waters I pressed onward, led forth by their shining lights,
As I shared my own to guide them on this journey of shared plights,

All the memories that surfaced of ships lost, the tales of grief and strife,
Paled to the realization that even in illness can still be precious life.

Now at last as I set anchor and emerge from this white sea,
I find that those I fought to heal, were also healing me.

A native of North Salt Lake and graduate of Utah State University and UUSOM. She is a psychiatry resident at the University of Utah and frequent Rubor contributor.